I can’t decide which are better - “good” days or “bad” days. A good day is when Ben is firing on more cylinders. He feels better; he is more alert; he can understand conversations enough to participate in them. A bad day is when he seems to be in a fog. He can tell he isn’t well; he needs help to do simple tasks; he can’t understand what people are saying and he misinterprets their meaning.
I can’t decide which days are better because they are both hard for different reasons. A bad day means a lot of hands on help and a lot of frustration for both Ben and us. A good day means that Ben thinks he can take care of himself and is angry that he has to live with us.
The Peel
On a good day, “It’s my condo and it’s my money. I have the right to live there!”
“Stop telling me to do things! I will do it when I want to!”
“I’ll move in with that gal who takes care of me 10 hours a week. I can pay her rent.”
“I’ve got to get out of here and you are holding me back!”
On a good day, he uses logic to form his arguments, but he can’t understand why we don’t agree wholeheartedly with him. He feels like we are putting unreasonable limits on him.
The Fruit
How different am I in my life? On a good day, I think that I can handle everything on my own. I don’t need God and I promptly forego my time with Him. At times, I am angry that my life has limits and that I can’t do whatever I want. But, when things are hard, I’m so thankful for His presence and the help He gives.
On a good day, I think I know what is best for my life and I don’t want someone else to tell me that they know better. On a bad day, I realize that God actually knows better and that I actually do need Him.
***
Thank you, God, for not changing from day to day even though I am changing all the time. You know what is best for me and it is the same no matter what kind of day I’m having.
"17 Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. "
(James 1:17 NLT)
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