My husband often talks about his fraternity hazing as being one of the most influential times of his life. He was motivated then by the desire to be accepted and be a part of a group of young men. He says it was the hardest thing he has ever done, but that he came out with a deep sense of accomplishment and a strong sense of camaraderie.
Now it seems like he is undergoing a different sort of hazing. This time, he is motivated by love for both his earthly father and his heavenly father. I can only imagine that he will come out of it with a deep understanding of having performed a great service and a deep connection with Abba Father.
The Peel
Just this last week, hazing came in the form of:
- Being yelled at constantly for stealing Ben’s stuff which he misplaced or couldn’t find,
- Being accused of doing nothing to help Ben,
- Ben packing boxes on a daily basis in hopes of moving out,
- Ben leaving out the front door in hopes of walking to his condo (almost 9 miles away),
- Ben swinging at both my husband and me and kicking the furniture out of frustration,
- Sleepless nights,
- Ben following him around like a vulture expecting to be entertained or moved out,
- Ben’s expression of “deserving to move out” and “not caring about anything else”,
- A general tension in the house even when Ben is not irate,
- Trying to include Ben among his own friend’s and personal life,
- Being a son, brother, father, husband, and friend to his other loved ones, and
- Running multiple businesses while also thinking about the future.
The Fruit
To some degree, I think my husband is not giving up for the same reasons he didn’t quit during hazing at college - he wants to prove something to himself. He wants to know that he did everything he could to respect his fathers and to see what Jesus meant by, “It is more blessed to give than to receive”. He wants his faith to grow and to reap the rewards of trusting the Lord.
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But when the appropriate time had come, God sent out his Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we may be adopted as sons with full rights. And because you are sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, who calls “Abba! Father!”.
Galatians 4:4-6 (NET)
You yourselves know that these hands of mine provided for my needs and the needs of those who were with me. By all these things, I have shown you that by working in this way we must help the weak, and remember the words of the Lord Jesus that he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”
Acts 20: 34-35 (NET)
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